The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

Todays Joke

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I gave a PS5 to my girlfriend..

Previous Dates

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I call my toilet "the jim" instead of "the john."

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What begins with “f” and ends in “uck”

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How did the farmer mend the holes in his jeans?

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Why don’t they play poker in the jungle?

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Two women were sharing the same ID card

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A drunk wakes up in jail, "Why am I here officer?". "For drinking." replies the cop.

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How does the Moon cut his hair when the Sun gets in the way?

1

Most people get shocked when they find out..

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I just watched a video of a drill.

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Did you hear about the new dating site for retired chemists?

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My daughter thinks I don't give her enough privacy.

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The best joke I can think of is quarantine.

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What does a dinosaur use to pay bills?

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Dad, what's a forklift?

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I bought a bunch of antique spears online, but they arrived without their spear heads.

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What do you call bears with no ears?

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I bought my friend an elephant for her room.

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My wife is threatening to leave me because I’m addicted to wearing a new T-shirt every half an hour.

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At any given moment, the urge to sing, “The Lion Sleeps Tonight”

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What do Romanians do when they're tired?

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Shout out to my grandma.

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Did you hear about the fight in the chip shop?

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Why does the man want to buy nine rackets?

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Two clowns are eating a cannibal.

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The iPhone vs Android debate has to stop!

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What are a communist's favorite units of time?

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People say that I am self-centred

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My wife says I'm addicted to drinking brake fluid

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When you go to bed you may be American

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I gave all my dead batteries away today…

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Want to hear a joke about pee?