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How did the farmer mend the holes in his jeans?
With cabbage patches.
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"Sergeant! Sergeant! The troops are revolting!"
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My wife divorced me because I'm a compulsive gambler...
All I can think about is how to win her back!
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Time flies when you're having fun.
When you're not having fun it usually takes the bus.
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Daughter: Where are the Himalayas?
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