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As a lumberjack, I know that I've cut exactly 3,141 trees.
I know because every time I cut one, I keep a log.
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I’ve just been attacked by a herd of cows.
I’m ok, but I’ve been badly grazed.
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My friend is obsessed with taking blurry pictures of himself while taking a shower.
He has serious selfie steam issues.
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Why was the broom late for work?
He overswept
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I don't trust these trees
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