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Wife: "Honey, I'm Pregnant."
Husband: "Hi Pregnant, I'm Dad" Wife: "No you're not...."
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My wife and a hand grenade have one thing in common
Remove the ring and my house is gone
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The waitress came over and saw my leftovers and asked, "do ya wanna box for that?"
I responded with, "no, but we can arm wrestle any day."
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I forgot where I threw my boomerang.
Oh. . . it's coming back to me now!
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What did the sushi say to the bee?
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