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My wife yelled, “Hey, the sun’s coming out!” So I wore my shorts and flip flops and came downstairs.
Found my son holding hand with his boyfriend.
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Which came first, the chicken or the egg?
The egg. Dinosaurs laid eggs long before chickens.
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My daughter was playing with my computer when she broke the R button and tried to eat it.
I guess she just craves anarchy.
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Did you hear about the guy who invented Altoids?
He made a mint.
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I don't trust these trees
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