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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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My friend was fired from a road construction job for theft.
I didn't believe it, but when I went over to his house, all the signs were there.
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A neutron walks into a bar and asks how much for a drink, bartender looks at him and says
"for you, no charge."
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My girlfriend asked if we could have an old movie night and watch “Gaslight”
I told her “we already watched that together, don’t you remember?”
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What do you call it when you go back for another helping of ice cream?
Secondairy.
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My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy
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