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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Dad to his daughter: "Never forget, sweetie, you're unique,
like everyone else."
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How many politicians does it take to change a lightbulb?
Two: one to change it and another one to change it back again.
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My wife came back from the store complaining about how the lady at the register was a total bitch.
I asked her if she was at self check out. Looks like I'm sleeping on the couch.
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So I was asking my brother how come he only uses his superpowers on my daughters
He said it’s because he only has telekinesis not telekinephews
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What did the sushi say to the bee?
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