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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Why did the cookie go to the doctor?
He was feeling crummy.
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How do you get two whales in a car?
Start in England and drive west.
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My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you're sleeping, send me your dreams. If you're laughing, send me your smile. If you're eating, send me a bite. If you're drinking, send me a sip. If you're crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
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A magician was driving down the street.
Then he turned into a driveway.
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My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy
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