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What word is always spelled wrong in the dictionary?
Wrong.
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We're opening a gym called Resolutions. It will have exercise equipment for the first two weeks of the year
and then turn into a bar for the rest of it.
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Why are the North Koreans the best at geometry?
Because they’ve got a Supreme Ruler.
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What do you call 52 pieces of bread?
A deck of carbs!
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My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy
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