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Teacher: What is the opposite of Anti-biotics?
Me: Uncle-biotics!
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I was rejected from the astronaut academy
I guess the sky is my limit
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Don't eat light bulbs.
It's not a bright idea for a light snack.
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How do you tell the difference between a frog and a horny toad?
A frog says, "Ribbit, Ribbit" and a horny toad says, "Rub it, Rub it".
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My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy
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