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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Teacher (on phone): You say Michael has a cold and can't come to school today? To whom am I speaking?
Voice: This is my father.
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I asked my boss, “Can I have a week off around Christmas?” He growled, “It’s May!”
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I won the "Most Secretive Guy" award in our office today.
I can't tell you how much this award means to me.
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My son said "Look! I'm a 3D printer!"
I told him to shut the toilet door when he poops.
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What did the sushi say to the bee?
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