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So I asked the dude next to me if he knew the chemical symbol for sodium hypobromite, and he was all like,
NaBrO
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Siri kept calling me Shirley this morning. I was starting to get really pissed off, and then I realized why...
I left my phone in Airplane mode
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Where do we store all our dad jokes?
In the dadabase!
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My son said "Look! I'm a 3D printer!"
I told him to shut the toilet door when he poops.
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Daughter: Where are the Himalayas?
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