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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
4
My girlfriend says if we don’t get married soon, she’s gonna kill me.
...it’s a matter of wife or death.
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My wife just said that in order for our marriage to work, we both need to make sacrifices.
I’m thinking of choosing a goat.
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I like to crouch down, hug my knees and lean forward.
That's just how I roll.
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Why did Stalin only write in lowercase?
He was afraid of capitalism.
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I left $100 in my suit jacket at the dry cleaners.
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