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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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My friend told me, “Your wife and daughter look like twins!”
I said, “Well, they were separated at birth.”
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I won the "Most Secretive Guy" award in our office today.
I can't tell you how much this award means to me.
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I find that computer programming is a great painkiller.
It involves a lot of codeine.
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Every morning I announce loudly to my family that I’m going jogging, but then don’t go.
It’s a running joke.
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I don't trust these trees
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