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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Me: Honey, I'm terrified of vowels. Wife: Ummm, why?
Me: Only sometimes.
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Why was Cinderella so bad at soccer?
Her coach was a pumpkin and she was always running away from the ball.
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To the guy who stole my antidepressants...
I hope you're happy now
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Three years ago my doctor told me I was going deaf...
I haven’t heard from him since
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My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy
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