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In college, I double-majored in accounting and dentistry...
Now I can crunch numbers AND numb crunchers.
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Most people get shocked when they find out..
I’m not their electrician.
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When I was born I was so surprised,
I didn't talk for a year and a half.
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Four years ago today, I asked out the girl of my dreams. Today, I asked her to marry me.
She said no both times.
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Daughter: Where are the Himalayas?
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