The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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If you have diarrhea,

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Does anyone need an ark?

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I told my boss that three companies were after me, and I needed a raise to stay at my current job.

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I was driving with my dad when we passed a cemetery. My dad goes in a low, dark, creepy voice, "I know something about this cemetery that you don’t.” And I was like what is it? He continued, "The people living in this town can’t be buried here.” I was really confused so I asked why?