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I won an award for being the best scarecrow in my field.
I told them, "Hay, it's in my jeans."
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When I got to work this morning, my boss stormed up to me and said, "You missed work yesterday, didn't you?"
I said, "No, not particularly."
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I owe a lot to the sidewalks.
They’ve been keeping me off the streets for years.
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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple?
Finding half a worm in your apple.
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I don't trust these trees
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