The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.

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I was arrested the other day for stealing people's electrons.

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When I turned 16, my dad told me it was time to get a job. “When I was your age, my very first job I had I worked with over 500 people under me.”... “Wow!” I said. “Was it some big corporation?”

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For years, my parents sent me to a child psychologist.

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Patient: When my hand heals, will I be able to play piano? Doctor: Yes, you'll be fine in a few days.