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I broke up with my girlfriend of 5 years because I found out she was a communist.
I should have known, there were red flags everywhere.
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Nurse: Doctor, did you take the patient's temperature?
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I couldn't decide whether my girlfriend was pretty, or ugly.
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I was born in the morning at 7:11
My parents thought it was pretty cool, but the store clerk wasn't happy about the mess.
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I don't trust these trees
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