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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
2
Have you heard about the new corduroy pillows?
They're making headlines!
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My wife accused me of hating her family and relatives...
I replied, "No, I don't hate your relatives. In fact, I like your mother-in-law a lot better than I like mine."
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In my twenties, I used to live on a houseboat, and started seeing the girl next door.
Eventually we drifted apart.
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Pirate Ship Captain: I am desperate. Can someone tell me how to write the number 2 in Roman numerals?
Crew: I I Captain.
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I don't trust these trees
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