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Don't ever have multiple people wash dishes together.
It's hard for them to stay in sink.
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Did you hear about the Giant that threw up?
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At first I thought it was great marrying an archeologist...
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My wife sent me a heartwarming text that read, “If you're sleeping, send me your dreams. If you're laughing, send me your smile. If you're eating, send me a bite. If you're drinking, send me a sip. If you're crying, send me your tears. I love you!”
I replied, “I'm on the toilet, please advise…”
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I don't trust these trees
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