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The best dad jokes and puns on the internet.
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Did you know you can actually listen to the blood in your veins?
You just have to listen varicosely.
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A man is washing his car with his son. The son asks,
"Dad, can't you just use a sponge?"
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Me: Know what Thanos says when he finds a rotten fruit in his garden? My kids: Ugh.
"It is... Inedible"
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What does the clock do when it's hungry?
It goes back four seconds.
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My girlfriend got mad at me for being lazy
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