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A sperm donor, a carpenter, and Julius Caesar walk into a bar.
He came, he saw, he conquered.
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What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
Breathe, damn it! Breathe!
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I buy my guns from a guy who calls himself "T-Rex."
He's a small arms dealer.
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Why are foot injuries so serious?
... because they take so long to heel.
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Daughter: Where are the Himalayas?
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